Thursday November 30 numbers, defined

MEtRoday: Wednesday B3090, Y3122, B3213; Thursday B2051, Y2030, Y3032, B5130

Wow! Let's look at those Thursday train numbers. 2051, 2030, 3032, 5130. All four trains consist of one of five numerals: 0, 1, 2, 3, 5. To graph them in the established way would be this, nice and asymmetrical:

but since we've got these five little numbers in these four little groupings, let's think about this differently. Making one 16-digit number from the four four-digit trains produces 2051203030325130. By keeping the 0s on the baseline, raising the 1s a line, raising the 2s twice as much, the 3s thrice as much and the 5s quince as much, we get something like this:

which looks striking similar to this guy but that's an entirely different post.

Back to our 16-digit number 2051203030325130. Taking the numerals in succession, we'll connect each like digits, regardless of their order:

flipping these arcs in a mirror image produces:

which can then be color coded:

Fun, ja?!

Hey kids, want your Metro train numbers jpg personalized with your own private color palette? Let me know!

Here's my new fave app that I'm going to use to check train numbers.

Tuesday November 28 ten years ago and a week late

MEtRoday: B3074, Y2068, B5159, Y5131, O1201

I first discovered the work of cartoonist Chris Ware sitting in a noodle shop, browsing the Reader, in Chicago during June 1996. I was there visiting Hal, who had some photography pieces in a mixed-media show called "Artikizm", and I was in town for the opening. (And also to get my heart broken, but that's a totally different story best left to when I can find journal archives from that time. Does anyone remember Open Diary? It's the original Blogger, and where I wrote entries for a couple of years.) Now back to Chris. Chris writes and illustrates these wonderfully melancholy full-page color strips in the Reader (Chicago's version of City Paper or Houston Press). He also works a great color palette. His most well-known character is Jimmy Corrigan, the Smartest Kid on Earth. Jimmy is not a kid, he's probably in his mid-thirties, lives alone and is "a little shy". From Jimmy's bio/personal ad:

"Music and dancing are another part of the many activities that are pleasing and relaxing, though I am not always familiar with their aspects. I even enjoy dining in or out, especially on slow evenings when no one is around... I am sorry that there is not a complimentary photo available, but you can reach me at home most days, preferably after 6pm central standard time."

Ware's work also spotlights the Acme Novelty Company, which seems to be a distribution channel for Jimmy Corrigan and other characters. When not featuring a major character, Ware's work will sometimes drift to cut-outs where you can assemble, say, a gazebo or a building from the Chicago's 1893 World's Columbian Exposition. Sometimes he'll tell an illustrative story that resembles an electrical diagram or literally show you how to build a better mousetrap. Fun stuff. A full-length graphic narrative of Jimmy Corrigan (none of the other episodes are sequential) was published in 2000 and is quite something in which to become submersed.

The reason I'm mentioning Mr. Ware is that I stumbled across this commission he did for the Thanksgiving covers of The New Yorker. See how Conversation, Family and Stuffing all tie together? Leftovers is another good example of Ware's style, where the story is not necessarily linear, you can read up, down, backwards and loop around while still getting the story, instead of reading traditionally left-to-right.

Monday November 27 doin' the doo(ty)

MEtRoday: R1222, R1268, R1121

Today is Jury Duty Monday so it's all about the red line, with Judiciary Square being both the target destination and the operating hub. Since it's rare that I'm on a red line train and don't get to include them in the graph-o-matic-could-you-please-explain-what-the-hell-that-means-again very often, I give you this:

Here is today's schedule at the Moultrie Courthouse:

8:11 check-in finished
9:48 first calling of jurors (not called)
10:05 second calling of jurors (called, not selected: 2nd degree murder case)
12:15–1:15 Lunch (mediterranean salad w/ chicken, pumpkin soup from au bon pain, coffee from footnotes cafe inside olsson's—Hey how about that! Three establishments with lowercase names. Just like fuju!)
1:26 third calling of jurors (not called)
2:34 released for the day

After reading this story a couple of months ago I wanted to visit The Third Day before its closing, and what better time than a half afternoon after being set free from performing my citizenly duties? The familiar green neon sign from Third Day has been a staple of Dupont Circle; I remember it from 1983 when I first started hanging out in Dupont, a green (harhar) kid from the 'burbs, checking out city life. I never went in Third Day, but always knew it was there, a friendly face in the crowd, after the departures of so many other long-established businesses: Vesuvius Pizza, anyone?

Luckily, the owner was working so I chatted with him about closing the store, and bought a gynura sarmentosa for my bathroom, which he potted for me right on the spot. See how nice that is? I'm sure the people working at the Olive Garden or whatever they're going to put in its place will not be so customer oriented.

Saturday November 25 gimme! gimme! gimme!

MEtRoday: none

If I were to successfully rob a bank and/or win a lottery, I would purchase and anonymously deliver these gifts:

this for this person
this for this person
this for this person

enough already

It's all a cycle of life, and we all go through it at some point or another. Sometimes it feels overwhelming, but we still must go forward, as sad and empty as it seems. This fall I feel death has touched me, very closely and also on the periphery. Uncle David. Kilian's father. Hum. And now there's Melba's father. I was 37 when I encountered my first death with a relative. So it's a little overwhelming to me when it comes this frequently. It's not as if what I'm feeling no one has ever felt before, but it makes me take a step backwards, hold my breath, and think of those I've loved today, those alive and those deceased.

Friday November 24 back to the world

MEtRoday: none

This morning I had my phone alarm set for 8:00 so I wouldn't sleep through a running opportunity again. The weather was dry and around 50°. The sun was in the eyes on the way out, and the wind was against me on the way back, but I made it. I ran from my parents house, down Route 694 to 664, and then followed 664 to Route 3, the main road. Roundtrip I think it's about four miles. Runtime: 46:00. Note: If you wash your running gear and find your iPod shuffle at the bottom of the washer, relax. Let dry and re-charge. It will work fine.

Today Chuck, Jackie and Sarah Jane are coming over for the afternoon and we're making Christmas cookies all day. We made three batches of cut-out sugar cookies, two batches of peanut butter cookies with the big Hershey's Kiss in the center, and two batches of my fave, toll house pan cookies (substitute milk chocolate for semi-sweet, natch). I think everybody had a stomach ache by the end because of all the cookies, cookie dough and treats we had in between: veggie tray, chips & queso. I figure we made about three huge messes in the kitchen, one with each round of cookie flavor, but it was a lot of fun and everybody joined in on the action.

When my 2-1/2 year-old niece Sarah Jane is in the house, she commands everyone's attention. Her favorite activity right now is grabbing a peacock feather my mother has in a vase, and tickling everyone with it. She also likes the Little Bear series, so we had to watch that tape about a dozen times. She asked me to color with her several times, so she enjoys doing that too. Maybe I'll get her one of those magic marker playmats that doesn't write on anything but the mat?

On the way home, a quick stop in to hang with PJ for a while and give her her medicine, and then it's back to Jump Street to see how Rattle is doing. She's very very very vocal, similar to that first time when she stayed out all night in Houston, and in the morning had to tell everyone all that she had done the night before. She's hanging right beside me right now, and purring, so everything's good.

Thursday November 23 gobble, pt. 2

MEtRoday: none

Since I slept until 11:30 this morning, there will be no pre-turkey running this year. Dag. There's always tomorrow.

Around 1:00 we load up and go over to my cousin Deidre's new house. She's very proud of it and it's very big and has a great flow between kitchen/dining/living rooms. She also noted that the closets are very large but I didn't peek into them. A tradition that my Aunt Darlene has (Deidre's mother) trickled down to Deidre's household as well. We all get in a circle, hold hands, and say what we are grateful for. There were some predicted responses: Thankful for everyone being together, for the food, etc. Some were very tearful: Jackie, my sister-in-law, being thankful for feeling so welcomed in the family, Deidre's daughter Whitney was thankful for the people who stuck by her during many hardships this year, and when it came to me, well, I had to mention Hum. I told everyone that she had just passed away not three weeks ago, and even though I miss her terribly, I was thankful for the 15-1/2 years that we had together. Weep, weep, weep.

The dinner we had was delicious: turkey and ham with all the trimmings and homemade cranberry sauce! I had two helpings and then I was about to pass out. Mom got tired after a little while so we needed to take her home. Luckily Dee's house only has a few steps into it, as we had to lift Mom in her wheelchair up and down. We easily did it. Later on that evening Chitty Chitty Bang Bang was on TV (one of my Dad's favorite movies, honest) so we all watched that and my Dad said when I was a kid my eyes would light up when Chitty came on the screen. Don't tell anyone.

Wednesday November 22 3-day work week

MEtRoday: Tuesday B4044, Y2034, B3281; Wednesday O5106

Since I am watching Goldy's cat, PJ (who has her own TV show), this weekend, I also have use of her car. Which means I can drive to work this morning and it takes me 14 minutes. FOURTEEN! Taking the 'tro takes 50–60 minutes. It's disgusting.

I meet Rob at Halo for pre-Thanksgiving cocktails. Seems everyone else in that gang has moved out, some of them far out, of the city so happy hour get togethers like this I believe are a thing of the past. Halo is a little empty since most of the transient residents have already left town for the holiday. Brandon buzzes in and I tell him to meet us there which he does. His clothing line, BLK SQRL, is being picked up by two stores, and one of them's in Balmer, Hon, and I am all about a road trip to check out his merch.

I'm home packing, gotta go quick! I'm worried about leaving Rattle here for 48 hours by herself for the first time [ever], but I've turned on Magic 102.3, closed the window and cranked the heat, and put out extra food and water. I hope she sleeps most of the time.

Monday November 20 i thought of a good title but forgot what it was

MEtRoday: B3066, B3232, Y3124, Y4077, Bxxxx

I'm trying to gear up for all the yummy eating to be done this week, so here's tonight's running playlist. Runtime 49:55.

Saturday November 18 gobble

MEtRoday: none

Today after kickboxing I started chopping broccoli. Lots of it. Katie's 4th Annual Turkey Potluck Saturday Before T-Day party is today, and I was bringing broccoli salad. I called my aunt Darlene earlier in the week to get her recipe. Just like how my mom cooks, she couldn't give me any of the measurements, just the ingredients. I love that. It's easy enough to make anyway and a Google search discovered many variations. They gave me guidelines for the measurements of the sauce, but I also discovered a tidbit that I was unaware of: if you quick boil the broccoli for one minute or less, its color turns very vivid yet still retains its crunch. So this is what I did. Refer to the pic below: uncooked on the left, cooked on the right. Simple ingredients: broccoli, golden raisins, sunflowers seeds, diced purple onion. Sauce is mayo, sugar and red wine vinegar. Although all of the googled ingredients called for white wine vinegar, I stayed with the red cuz that's what Darlene done told me to.

There was so much food at the party! I swear, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, if only for the food. I even took home some leftovers. Yum!

Friday November 17 round trip

MEtRoday: Thursday B3088, Y3029, Y2005, B1215; Friday O4040, Y3049, B5005, Y2023, B5005

Check out Friday's MEtRoday: two rides in the evening on Blue 5005. How, you ask? When I get on the Metro at Braddock, I usually take the yellow line up to L'Enfant Plaza and then transfer to whichever train comes next to go to Eastern Market. If a blue comes at Braddock I usually let it go and wait for a yellow, because it seems quicker to wait a couple of minutes than to ride the blue all the way around and thru downtown. Apparently it doesn't, although I remember waiting 10 minutes or so for the next train at L'Enfant, so there was a backup or sorts somewhere. Isn't there always? The reason I got on a blue at Braddock was that it was so cold and windy, and I transfered to the yellow at Crystal City, which is underground (Braddock is above ground and therefore susceptible to the elements. I don't think I've hit a double on the same day (much less on the same trip) since I've been tracking. Let's graph these two.

Last night I went back to the vet hospital to pick up Hum's cremains. The quantity of ashes is a lot less than I imagined. I had no idea what to expect; her remains are about the volume of a tennis ball. The crematorium included a Certificate of Cremation, a note saying they had made a donation to the Animal Welfare League of Montgomery County in memory of Hum and a pin of a cat with wings and a halo, representing Hum's guardian angel. I know that's a little cheesy, but it was still enough to get me choked up in the car on the way home.

I don't know where Hum's temporary resting place will be, but for now I've placed her by a picture of the Twins™ that I already had framed. Note to readers: do not pick up your pet's cremains and then watch the final episode of the final season of Six Feet Under. You will be a mess.

Wednesday November 15 60 mins

MEtRoday: Tuesday O3020, Y3096, Y3066, O5034; Wednesday B1163, B1008, Y3264, Y3146, B3066

These are the commercials I sat through during one hour of television tonight:

Verizon Wireless Vcast
Movie: Deck the Halls
Secret Platinum Deodorant
Totino's Mega Pizza Rolls
Kohl's
Dove Body Lotion
The CW: The Game

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Sprint
Movie: Horrorfeast
The CW: One Tree Hill
Caress Body Wash
Pledge
Old Navy
Fisher Price Fun to Learn Pre-School Center
The CW: One Tree Hill
The CW: Friends
Toyota Hybrid Synergy Drive
Comcast
Movie: Turistas Go Home
The CW: My Wife and Kids
The CW: Reba
The CW: Supernatural

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Cover Girl (My Life As A...)
Cover Girl
Campbell's Soup
Movie: John Tucker Must Die
Chili's
JC Penney
The CW: Girlfriends
The CW: Supernatural

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T-mobile
Kohl's
Movie: Accepted
Victoria's Secret
Aussie Hair Products
KMart Martha Stewart
The CW: Smallville
ydouthink.com
Mazda
McDonald's
The CW: Friends
The CW: One Tree Hill

---

Secret
Target
Fruity Cheerios
Ziploc Big Bags
Campbell's Soup
The CW: Reba
The CW: One Tree Hill

---

Cover Girl

Monday November 13 think pink

MEtRoday: O5051, Y3264, Y3017, B5122

Last week I spoke with the vet hospital, checking in on Hum's cremation. They gave me the name of Heavenly Days, who actually performs the cremation. Today I called them and spoke with Greg, a very nice and informative fellow. Hum is scheduled to be privately cremated tomorrow. Her cremains (I didn't know this word existed) will then be transferred back to the hospital, where I will be able to pick them up later this week. They supply the ashes in a wooden box, which I guess is fine for now, but I will be on the hunt for something more permanent. Greg told me I had the choice of a sculpted or smooth box (I chose smooth), sealed or unsealed (I chose unsealed) and it will have a lock & key and a ribbon. I hope the ribbon is pink to match the collars the Twins™ wore when they were kittens.

Sunday November 12 here's where the story ends

MEtRoday: none

Tonight I did the previously unthinkable: One picture, one Twin.

Saturday November 11 get out

MEtRoday: none

Alice is making the trek into town from Nokesville. She's picking me up, and we're going over to Goldy's for cocktails before hopping the skreet to the Evolve Urban Arts Project at the pHierce School. Since the temperature is uncommonly warm for November we ended up spending most of the time not viewing the artwork, but instead hanging out by the pool drinking wine with friends. Good times. 142 photos were taken, 26 were deleted (out of focus, blinking, whatthehellisthat?), and here are the selects:

Friday November 10 b_sy _s _ b__

MEtRoday: O1229, Y2031, Y3094, B3050

I'm trying to keep myself busy and you should too. Here are some fun links:

The Collective Type Project—An online collaboration to creative a new typeface. All the letter characters have already been taken, but who says punc.tuation can't be fun? Contribute!

Baghdaddy—Great animation, even if you don't agree with the content.

Cute Overload—If you're ever, ever having a bad day just go here and enjoy the cutefest.

STFU—No one says it quite like Babs. Remember when Striesand dropped the F-bomb during a recent concert? Now you can flip it on 45 and dance to it.

And would somebody please give this baby some oxygen?

Thursday November 09 day four

MEtRoday: Tuesday B4008, B4035, Y2017, Y2008, O3048; Wednesday O1209, O1103, Y3067, Y2065, B3096; Thursday O1298, Y3048, Y3264, B3153

It has been a rough week. I stayed home from work on Monday, to monitor Rattle and see how she is taking her sister's absence. Over the last few days I've noticed she will go to the places that Hum always used to sleep: a certain spot on the couch, the left end table, in the kitchen by the refrigerator. She will sniff, look around, sniff some more and then move on. I don't know what this means to her, if she is comprehending what has happened. I'm trying to keep things as normal as I can for her: same feeding times, same nightly routine, etc. Of course I'm watching her like a hawk now.

I found this website which has really helped me a lot. It tells about multi-cat households, and what happens when one pet, or the owner, goes missing. It gives behavioral tips to watch out for, aspects to keep at a constant, and some case studies. Nobody knows what animals are thinking, and maybe our anthropomorphism towards them is only to relieve our own suffering or discomfort, but at times like this it seems to make me feel better.

I would to thank everyone for their warm, heartfelt wishes you have given this week. It's me and one Twin now, and the comfort you've given me, and in turn Rattle, means so very much to me.

Monday November 06 the twins™

MEtRoday: none

Fifteen years ago, when I was in college, I went over to my friend Mike Touchette's house; his cat had just had five kittens so it was fun to see and play with them. The mother cat was black, and the litter consisted of one black, one brown, one tan and two grey tabby kittens. While all the kittens were running around being kittens, I noticed the two tabbies were over in a corner, consumed by something that was going on between them. At further investigation I discovered they had a dowel rod between them (we were architecture students so there were always miscellaneous art supplies everywhere), and they were batting it back and forth. Mike said "Those two usually do that, they go off and play with each other and leave the other kittens alone." He had also named all the kittens even though he was only planning on keeping the black one. Since the two tabbies were identical no one could tell their individual names apart; everyone started calling them "The Twins". I was smitten. Two days later, I showed up with a cardboard box and brought them home to live with me.

Since then, I've maintained the whole "Twins" concept, without naming them except for medical reasons when I need to discern who-has-which history. For the record, those names are Rattle & Hum, taken from the 1988 U2 concert film of the same name. One of them, Rattle, purred louder than the other, Hum, and that's how those names came about. I've never called them by these names, I could always call out "Twins!" and they would both come running. When you get one, you get the other, like bookends. They have always been photographed together within the same frame, I don't think a single photo exists of just one of them without the other. Keeping with the same concept, I once asked Mike when their exact birthday was. He couldn't recall the date, but he did remember that it was "A Wednesday in May". So their birthdays are celebrated every Wednesday in May with wet food and special treats. Sometimes they would luck out and get a May that had five Wednesdays in it. They would really be spoiled that year. They shared everything: the food/water bowl and litter box, they wrestled and slept together, and groomed each other.

Last night I noticed Hum was being very listless and still. I found her lying in the bathroom, which I thought was an odd place for her, and picked her up. I could always scoop them up like babies, with them on their backs and I could scratch and rub their tummies. Most cats won't let you touch their stomachs, but I had been doing this to them since they were kittens so they actually would purr and enjoy it. When I picked her up, I noticed her eyes were very cloudy and unfocused and her breathing was raspy and shallow. I immediately called Goldy to see if she could take me to the 24-hour animal hospital, which of course she could. I knew something was drastically wrong and that I would probably not be bringing her back, I thought I would have to make the difficult choice of putting her to sleep. I brought Rattle over to her and placed her down beside Hum, trying to force some acknowledgment on Rattle's part that something was wrong, and that she might need to say goodbye to her sister, in whatever way cats might do that. I also did it for Hum, so that she might say goodbye.

She meowed throughout some of the ride up across town, but as we got closer she was silent but I could still hear her breathing. I had my hand in the carrier stroking her for the whole ride. We go inside and the doctor takes her back in to the examination room. A nurse comes out and asks permission to administer an IV and a breathing tube to which I agree. A few minutes later she hurriedly comes back out and informs me they are giving CPR to Hum and I need to come back into the exam room. When I go in, they are massaging her chest and the doctor asks me if I want them to continue with the CPR. I have no idea what to do at this point. The doctor says her surviving prognosis is not good even if they resuscitate her, so I tell them to stop. She already looked pitiful in her condition with the tube coming out of her mouth. So she died right there.

They lead me into a smaller waiting room and then bring Hum in wrapped in a towel, so that I could spend some final moments with her. I kissed and petted her and told her how much I loved her. I am going to have her cremated so that one day I can mix her and Rattle's ashes together.

Rest in Peace, Hum, 1991–2006

Sunday November 05 ¡ special !

I just got a grand swish shoutout from Princess Sparkle Pony! I am now officially a Pony Pal™. [bows gracefully]

Sunday November 05 doubleheader

MEtRoday: none

With a nod to The Specials, I go out on Saturday night and I come home on Sunday afternoon. Last night I was going to go over to Katie's for movies and chinese food, but then it was re-directed to the pHierce School. Attendees: Jeff, Katie, Eddy, Goldy, Seattle. Jeff had some Smirnoff North that he brought back from his and Chris' recent trip to Greece. Jeff served it chilled as shots; it tasted like Kool-Aid. Delicious! I believe the plan was to still order the chinese food and watch a movie, but of course we never left the bar. Can you believe that we had to contact three chinese takeouts until we found one that would make a delivery @ 10:15 on a Saturday night? Ridiculous. But by the time the food arrived, I think I may or may not have been FORCED to have too many of the North shots that I had to go upstairs and find a bed to lie down in. I was the first but apparently not the last of people that would be disappearing to find places to lie down that evening. Since I had first pick of bedrooms, I chose the White Room, which is my fave at the pHierce School. My camera batteries were completely depleted at this point so there are no pix of the WR. I'll try to get some next time I'm there.

I wake up around 7 on Sunday morning, and resume a text message convo with Katie. A little later I wander downstairs and have coffee with Jeff, and it's at this point that I realize I am not the only overnight guest. Seattle crashed, as did Eddie, or so we thought. On my way out, I wonder over to Goldy's (she lives across the skreet), wake her up, and have more coffee. We then invite Jeff over for even more coffee. By now it's brunch time so we head over to Henry's for their buffet.

Sidenote: Jeff drives a Chevy Tahoe. This thing is huge. It has a navigation system which charts your course/location and will also show on the map where food stores and ATMs are. Very cool. It also has a DVD player so we watched a dirty movie on the way to brunch.

Saturday November 04 the misunderstanding

MEtRoday: none

I started my Netflix queue a few years ago, so I get unexpected surprises that were lined up years ago but just now appear in my mailbox. I'm talking about the Anna Nicole Smith Show. Oh. My. God. I had heard about this trainwreck before, but actually watching it now, four years after it's copyright date, I'm not sure if it's more tragic or more farce. It's apparent there is an act going on, for in her "testimonial" segments where she's sitting on a porch swing and being interviewed, she's more coherent and there is no Betty Boopish blond airhead accent happening. The rest of the time, well, it's comically awful. And could the Jewish lawyer/confidant/advisor/fuckbuddy please stop being so Jewish? Good God/Allah/Muhammad/GeorgeWBush, can you please utter a sentence without using the words "free/support/honor Israel"? Todah rabah!

Thursday November 02 don't believe the hype

MEtRoday: Wednesday O5112, Y3111, Y4049, B5144; Today none

I think I heart Volvos. I'm on press inspection today and tomorrow, so that means it's Zipcar time. It seems they've switched out my V50 that I've used before and substituted the S40. Basically the same model, but this is the sedan instead of the wagon. I like the rear visibility the wagon offers, but the sedan is still quick and peppy to drive. Plus there's just something about that roofline. I swear, it's the smoothest riding car I've ever driven.

My Fantasy Life As a Volvo Owner: Yes, that's right. I am cruising up a numbered street on Capitol Hill, refreshed from working a 10-hour day at my prestigious job that makes my friends envious and my parents proud. I have just finished shopping at the mall and boutique stores too, you can check the perfectly placed and aligned shopping-bags-with-handles in the trunk if you don't believe me. There you will find $120 shirts and $280 shoes and some frivolous items that I simply could not do without. (This is necessary not only because it makes me feel good, but because when I am finishing my workout routine at the gym in the morning and after my daily shave, I apply cologne to my face and body and dress in a crisp shirt, clever tie and freshly pressed suit with four buttons. I shine.) I might be on my way home, which could either be a cozy and quaint two-bedroom rowhouse on a quiet and leafy urban street or a fabulous 12-foot ceiling one-bedrooom-plus-den loft that also has a floor-to-ceiling curtain wall in my living and bedrooms, overlooking the city which twinkles like my own personal snowflake. Regardless of my domestic option, my living space is tasteful, immaculate, sparse yet does not feel cold. Frequent guests feel comfortable and envioius when they visit. Photographs taken from gatherings I've had there over the years resemble magazine spreads. But I'm not on my way home; I'm en route to meet friends for dinner, drinks and clever and witty banter. For that's what we successful folk do in the city, we meet at restaurants and pay people to bring us food, all at 10% tax. But this tax really doesn't matter to me, because I've parked my charcoal gray Volvo right out in front of the restaurant, I'm closing the sunroof and locking the door, all the while feeling profitable, probably being watched, and oozing completeness which is verifed with the soft yet solid ka-thunk of my Volvo's door. I will eagerly place down my debit card and pay for this meal at DC Coast, Tallula or Chef Geoff's. Because I know that this $100 evening (possibly more if we order wine with dinner) will be a mere blip in my financial statement. Need a lift?

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I saw this term on Wonkette today: Confederepublican. My definition: Modern-day Republicans who pine for pre-emancipation liberties of espousing their bigotry in public. President Lincoln's name, but not principles, is often thrown about without any acknowledgment of its irony.

Kelly's new video is out and ohmigawd stop shopping for shoes and like watch it, 'kay?!

This bunny can understand Japanese and open correspondence? That's crazy!